Here we go again...

its been quite a while since i last blog, getting kinda lazy. there are lots of stuff going through my mind which i would wanna blog but just couldn't squeeze out enough motivational juice to do it. i even wrote down on paper what to write but oh well nvm, perhaps when i'm in a more bloggy mood.

in case anyone is wondering why i'm blogging on a monday night, its not that i'm sick again or anything. i graduated from SMM today, finally after 9 weeks, i'm a certified medic. now lets just hope i don't get myself in DB. well didnt get posted to where i wanted to, instead i got posted to 6SIR. gonna report tmr at maju camp in clementi! the jokes of life, u always get posted to the other end of the world. baaa..... sianz totally!! stay in some more, waaaa i was praying for stay out!! haiz.....

i just realized that i've learnt a lot in these past 2 months, as much as what the nurses learnt in 2 years or so. maybe not exactly similar but majority of the important stuffs i know liao. however there are holes that need to be filled up, through experience and more knowledge, which can only be accquired through time.

guess i better turn in, gotta wake up early tmr morning. sianz............... lights out!

Revelations...

Alright... After about 2 weeks of mia, I'm finally back blogging again. the past 2 weeks had been a choppy ride. i shall not elaborate on the events of the first week, some of you already know so i will spare u the torture of it.

we've been prepared, knowing the worst is upon us and the time has come to let go. Mama was called home on the 5th of August in her sleep. i was in camp that time, getting for a test. i had no idea what was happening when my sergeant told me i had to go on off pass asap. initially i thought the navy medical check up had been brough forward, i only realised the truth when my buddy went "oi! i first one leh, now u come in, wat happen to ur grandmother??". then it hit me like a 3 tonner ramming into me. i felt like i was crushed inside out, my mind went blank. thanks a lot ah buddy, my sergeant kept it from me so i could finish the practical test properly but now, guess not.

at the wake the following day, i did "guard duty" with my dad. stayed with him through out the night till the next morning. it was pretty interesting during that time. aunt irene and her daughter accompanied us for quite a bit before going home. those 2 were an amusing couple, its funny looking at them bickering, sharon was always disturbing her mom. they were with us till about 2am. after they left, dad and i did some house keeping before sitting down for some father-son talk. dad told me aout his childhood, exact places where he played, lived and work. i realised i could have been bloody rich too but nvm, don think abt it i will tui... much can change about a place but deep within these metamorphosis, the memories still lingers. at about 5am, james kor came to accompany us, saying that he cannot sleep already. great! more company to make time move faster. i realised how time can erode past memories and relationship without one even knowing. it was heart warming to catch up with one another and fill up those missing years. its amazing how chatting for 2 hours can make a world of difference, its nice to once again feel comfortable with each other, like how it was when we were young.

it was very very solemn yesterday at the crematorium. we had a last service for mama before sending her body back to where it came from. that minute when the casket was approaching the furnace was long and painful, like floodgates opening, torrents of tears flow fast and free, even my dad who was the pillar of strength for everyone could not keep those tears from escaping, hearing the first sniff from him, i too broke down.

ok i need to brush teeth, not much time left, got lots of stuff to do. my room is in a horrible mess for dunno how long already, maybe i will tidy up later. gotta send lydia those photos too. ahhh so many things so little time. gotta go....

btw, happy birthday Edna!!